Your planning threads

Our Scottish / Boho / Forest / Castle Wedding (2018)


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The Brie sounds right up my street- at least you had the opportunity through the taster to know that things weren’t right for your wedding. We’ve had a taster which was all fab, so hoping the random things we’re likely to choose and not tried are also good.

It’s so hard! My mum said though; you don’t recommend a restaurant after trying all the dishes but you get an idea and move forward on that! 

I personally love shin of beef too, something I think I’ve only ever had at weddings? 


Sian91 wrote (see post):

The Brie sounds right up my street- at least you had the opportunity through the taster to know that things weren’t right for your wedding. We’ve had a taster which was all fab, so hoping the random things we’re likely to choose and not tried are also good.

It’s so hard! My mum said though; you don’t recommend a restaurant after trying all the dishes but you get an idea and move forward on that! 

I personally love shin of beef too, something I think I’ve only ever had at weddings? 

I do think we were being very picky. I review restaurants on my blog and so pay particular attention to detail. In general the food at Rowallan was very nice. I just Was red to make sure everything is perfect for our wedding.

As you say there is a bit of risk in completely switching dishes. And so we have to hope that the things we chose blindly are good.

What your mum said is very true. Although it would be nice to have the food tasting before you commit to the venue ;)

I always thought of shin of beef as quite a homey meal. I've not been to that many weddings though. Do maybe it's a very typical wedding dish?



Together with the food we tried five different housewives. Three white and two red. Of these we were to pick two for our wedding. Because MrM was driving the arduous task of trying the wine fell on me.

We started with white wines.

The first wine was a Chilean Sauvignon Blanc. We both enjoyed it. But it was very dry. And potentially not to everyone's taste.

The second wine was a Italian Pinot Grigio. It was slightly less dry and more floral than the first one. This is also the wine we picked for our white option.

The third wine was a Australian Chardonnay. I live Australian wines but hate Chardonnays. I didn't even finish my glass of this one.

Then the reds.

The first red wine we tried was a Chilean Merlot. Merlot is generally popular. And this one was really smooth and drinkable. It's the one we chose for our wedding.

The second red wine was a Spanish Tempranillo. It was a lot denier and not as smooth. Not really up our street.




I really like the idea of surrounding our cake with bowls of sweets. A sweet table of sort. And I have been collecting cut glass bowls for this purpose. However our contract says we cannot bring in any food or drink. So I checked with Liz and she told me as long as I let her know, having sweets should be fine.



For our proseco reception I was keen to have a pimp your own station. Almost everyone has these now. So I checked with George how much it would cost to add one. When he told me 50£ the decision was made.



Gary and I love sloe gin and treat ourselves on a regular basis on it. So we were hoping to have mini bottles of sloe gin as favours. However we aren't allowed to bring these in ourselves. Rowallan originally quoted 5£ per person for these. Which is far too expensive in my opinion. But George told me they can probably make them cheaper. So we might be able to have them afterall.



One thing that we really liked about Newton Hall was that their package included a cocktail tailored to the couple. MrM loves cocktails. Rowallan offers something similar. They set up a cocktail bar in the library and bring in a cocktail master from Glasgow. We then get to choose two cocktails. Anything we want. And the first 100 cocktails are included in the price. It costs 500£. Now we were going to stick 500£ behind the cash bar. But I know that MrM really likes the idea of this cocktail bar. I think his heart is kind of set on it. It also adds a bit of entertainment to the evening. However I am not sure how all the guest especially from my side would feel about it. If they'd rather we paid for their first drink of choice So this remains to be decided. Although we are leaning towards having the cocktail bar.


britbird wrote (see post):

Love how critical you are on the food- exactly like I was!  Def sounds like it will work itself out though!

Haha. Thanks Britbird. I hope we weren't too critical. We do want the caterers on our side. And I was trying to be nice in the way I worded things.

Because we swapped a few courses completely we are going in with a blind eye. Hope everything works out.

Nervous though.



I finally went ahead last night and bought my shoes for the day. I picked the Cherie Lace heels from Pink Paradox.

They aren't too detailed for my dress, but arent really boring either. I just hope they are comfortable and that the heel isn't too high.

They should arrive in a couple of days. If they fit I'll wear them in for the next few months. 

They cost 55£, so I could always get a pair of flat shoes for the ceilidh.




I forgot to mention that I booked our appointment for giving notice last week. It's going to happen on the 6th of July, so exactly three months before our wedding.

Very exciting!

Now I just need to make sure we have all the paperwork ready. Because I was born in Germany, I need a translated birth certificate. I believe I already have one but need to make sure everything is in order. We also need to pick our witnesses.



I had bought a pair of vintage suitcases from Amazon. One will be used for our DIY photobooth. I was intending to use the other one for our cards. However after buying the confetti cones I realised I needed a container for them. So I think I will use the small suitcase for that purpose.

That means I need a new Wedding Post Box. A couple of girls in the forum bought theirs from eBay. And I just went ahead and stole the idea. 

We are thinking of spray painting it a bronze gold colour to go with the rest of our theme.



So I'm not sure if I have mentioned this before, but we are having a wedding weekend of sorts. We are paying for our closest family to stay at Rowallan the night before as a little thank you. It's where a good chunck of our budget is going.

I'm half German and so the night before the wedding, we will be having a Polterabend at the castle. Traditionally the entire village is invited to do this. However we will just be inviting our family and friends to the event.

I have given my mum the task to arrange the Polterabend. I thought it might make her happy. So I don't know all the details. However I do know we will be following a couple of German traditions.


All of our guest will be bringing along one item of porcelain and smashing it on the ground outside of the castle. Men and I will then be responsible for sweeping up the mess. This is done for good luck and to show that the couple are good at teamwork.


Another tradition is for the couple to saw a lot together. Again this is to show that you work well together. My dad is responsible for sourcing the log, stand and saw.


It wouldn't be a German wedding without beer. As part of the pre-wedding ceremony, the couple buys a keg of beer for the guests. Rowallan have said they will try to source some German beer. However we need to figure out if we can pay for the keg or need to buy the beer by the pint. This is one of the issues with package venues.


Traditionally the family of the bride butters a whole lot of sandwiches the night before the wedding. We discussed this with the caterers at Rowallan and decided to have a buffet. This will consist of buttered fresh bred, platters of meat, potatoes & leek soup and a tray of sticky toffee pudding.  Hopefully that will satisfy everyone.



I am in the process of writing our wedding ceremony. Because we are having a humanist wedding, the script is entirely up to us. Its a ver slow process, but one of the biggest items on our list.

However we have finally picked our readings. We are having two. Thinking of having my aunt read one and MrM's Aunt the other one. Although I just realised my second aunt might get upset. Hmm need to think about that.

I picked out a selection of readings I found in various places then forwarded the list to MrM. He picked the final ones.

Here is what we are going with.


May your marriage bring you all the exquisite excitements a marriage should bring, and may life grant you also patience, tolerance, and understanding.
May you always need one another — not so much to fill your emptiness as to help you to know your fullness. a mountain needs a valley to be complete. The valley does not make the mountain less, but more. And the valley is more a valley because it has a mountain towering over it. So let it be with you and you.
May you need one another, but not out of weakness. May you want one another, but not out of lack. may you entice one another, but not compel one another. May you embrace one another, but not out encircle one another.
May you succeed in all-important ways with one another, and not fail in the little graces. May you look for things to praise, often say, “I love you!” and take no notice of small faults. If you have quarrels that push you apart, may both of you hope to have good sense enough to take the first step back.
May you enter into the mystery that is the awareness of one another’s presence — no more physical than spiritual, warm and near when you are side by side, and warm and near when you are in separate rooms or even distant cities.
May you have happiness, and may you find it making one another happy. may you have love, and may you find it loving one another.
Blessing for a Marriage by James Dillet
We both particularly liked the part where it refers to us as mountain and valley. We are both polar opposites of each other. But we do compliment each other for that exact reason.
As you set out for Ithaka
hope the voyage is a long one,
full of adventure, full of discovery.
Laistrygonians and Cyclops,
angry Poseidon—don’t be afraid of them:
you’ll never find things like that on your way
as long as you keep your thoughts raised high,
as long as a rare excitement
stirs your spirit and your body.
Laistrygonians and Cyclops,
wild Poseidon—you won’t encounter them
unless you bring them along inside your soul,
unless your soul sets them up in front of you.
Hope the voyage is a long one.
May there be many a summer morning when,
with what pleasure, what joy,
you come into harbors seen for the first time;
may you stop at Phoenician trading stations
to buy fine things,
mother of pearl and coral, amber and ebony,
sensual perfume of every kind—
as many sensual perfumes as you can;
and may you visit many Egyptian cities
to gather stores of knowledge from their scholars.
Keep Ithaka always in your mind.
Arriving there is what you are destined for.
But do not hurry the journey at all.
Better if it lasts for years,
so you are old by the time you reach the island,
wealthy with all you have gained on the way,
not expecting Ithaka to make you rich.
Ithaka gave you the marvelous journey.
Without her you would not have set out.
She has nothing left to give you now.
And if you find her poor, Ithaka won’t have fooled you.
Wise as you will have become, so full of experience,
you will have understood by then what these Ithakas mean. 

I added this to my list of potential readings because I thought MrM might like it. He is really into history and I thought he might appreciate the Greek Mythology. We also travel a lot and this refers to marriage as a voyage. Which I thought was quite fitting. Turns out so did MrM



Yesterday afternoon we had our engagement shoot at Hardwick Park in Durham. It was such a nice setting for the photoshoot.

I was so nervous about this and to be honest still am. I really hope that they got at least a couple of nice pictures. And that I don't look like a huge dumpling in all of them. I definitely feel more comfortable behind the camera then in front of it.

We purposefully looked for a photographer who focuses on natural pictures. My dad is the only one who can get nice pictures of me because he shoots them when I don't notice. My stepdad always makes us stand in a group and without exception I look like I'm about to have a dump.

Our photographers are a married couple. While the husband mostly took close up detail shots of us, his wife snuck off. I guess she took pictures of us and we didn't even notice. Craig talked a lot, made us laugh and generally tried to make us feel comfortable. He also gave us a few tips on how to stand naturally.

The photoshoot was a mix of posed and natural. For instance we were asked to walk hand in hand around the corner and to talk to each other. We also sat on a ruin, against a fence in the forest and on top of a hill. 

I didn't shake the nerves entirely. And I did talk a lot. So I hope I don't look like a clown. 

Will update with pictures as soon as I get them.



On my list of things to do last month was to create the gift boxes for my bridal party. To be honest I have been looking at this since the start of wedding planning but have found it really difficult to make decisions.

We had come across a company that creates gift boxes at the unruly show. However their boxes cost from 45£ upwards and aren't personalised. So I decided to make my own.

I finally went ahead and ordered a couple of things.


The first thing I bought were some personalised hangers. Yes I could make them myself. But I'm a busy girl. I'd rather pay someone else to do it.

I got these for my MOH, Bridesmaid and one for myself.



I got them in navy and will give them to my maid of honour, bridesmaid, mum and my fiance mum. I hope they will wear them when we get ready.

 Navy Blue Charmeuse Satin Robe with lace trim-Bride Bridesmaid Flowergirl -Monogrammable- regular, plus and children's sizes

I also bought a white robe for myself. 

They will all be embroidered with our first initial. I personally think this is better than having the role. 



I saw these quite a while ago and always meant to buy them. I finally did today. I particularly like that the message is printed inside. Again this means my girls can use them in the future.

I got a makeup bag for my MOH, Bridesmaid and both Flowergirls.

I intend to fill them with a couple of bits and bobs. Including paracetamol for the next day.

 Personalised Thank you Gift - Bridesmaid Gift Make Up Bag - Maid of Honour Gift - Unique Gift for Bridal Party - Wedding Makeup Cosmetic Bag



I got my MOH, Bridesmaid and Platforms a very simple gold bracelet. It as a knot in it and I intend to add a little more THANKING them for helping me the the knot.

Knot Bracelet -Bridesmaid Gift Set 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 -Adjustable Tie the Knot Bangle Charms -Gold /Rose Gold /Silver -Knotted -Wedding Proposal


I got this idea from someone else on the forum. VASELINE allows you their little tins. So I ordered five for my MOH, Bridesmaid and the Flowergirls.



Finally I got the girls a small candle hand poured in London. 

Maid of Honour Gift | Hand poured Mini Soy Candle | Candles Wedding Favor | Maid of Honor Candle | Engagement Candle | Alternative Wedding


Hey DandelionBlue!

Just caught up on your plans!! I love that you wanted to get the food just right, it's important and you want the best for your guests. This isn't just any day, it's your wedding day and has to be right!

Love the shoe choice, my advice would be to break in the shoes and if you get flats as well break them in. I didn't and I suffered!! 

Love the presents!! The makeup bags are good quality, I can vouch for that!


Hi MrsBeehan. Thank you so much for reading through my thread and commenting. I was starting to feel a little lonely here. It's nice to know someone else is reading through it.

Thank you for making me feel better about being quite picky about the food. I don't like disappointing people and rarely say no. So felt pretty bad. But as you said we want it to be perfect for our guests on our wedding day.

I received my shoes yesterday. They are a bit too big, so I need to send them back. Also, the heel is higher than I was hoping. But I really like the shoes. So I might train myself to walk in them. Your point about breaking them in is a good one. Definitely planning to do that.

Oh. Did you get the same pouches? They look really pretty online.




loving your thread especially your bridal party gofts, my colour is also navy and I’ve gone for navy robes for mph mob and my two daughters and I’ve got a white one. 

Please can I ask where you got the make up bags from?


Thank you, I love the meaning behind the bracelet as well. I think it’s nice to have subtle presents like you’ve picked so that they are able to use them every day .


I love Navy so that’s our main colour plus white and geeen for flowers. Our whole plans are about to change I think but still keeping the navy x


Augudt19. Thank you. It's not my idea actually. I think another girl on the forum inspired me. But I did try very hard to get the girls mainly things they can keep afterwards.

Our plans changed lots as well. If you look at the title of this thread and my initial ideas. Well our wedding will be nothing like that. I think it's normal. But we did stick to navy. It's the first choice by OH and I made. I did have colour scheme wobbles now and then. But navy stuck.



I sat MrM down this weekend to help me choose our bridal party gifts for the men. I had already earmarked a couple of things. But wanted his opinion. I was waiting for the last name of his usher, but now that I have it, will be ordering the presents at lunchtime today. So here is what we will be getting.


Since I am getting the girls makeup bags, I thought getting both the best man and usher a toiletry bag was a nice symmetry. Might pop a hangover kit into it too. We are going for the tan coloured ones.


Originally we were going to get the boy a flask. But I think this is a really common bridal party gift. And I didn't want them to end up with loads of flasks. So we decided to buy them personalised pocketwatches. It goes with the vintage feel of our wedding and is something they will hopefully keep as a memorandum somewhere.


We are getting these for the best man and usher, as well as my dad and step-dad. Again it doesn't really mention our wedding, so I hope they keep them in their cupboards.


MrM's dad doesn't drink whiskey. So it felt wrong to get him a whiskey glass. Instead we are getting him an engraved beer glass.